Radiation

About 2 weeks ago, Mom and I went to meet with Dr. Lingos, my radiation oncologist to discuss and plan for my radiation treatments.  I had met with her last October and got "mapped" for radiation, as we thought I would not be having chemo.   The mapping involved giving me 4 small blue tattoos, which helps them get you lined up to deliver the radiation.  Luckily, they were able to re-use those tattoos. 

The biggest item for discussion with Dr. Lingos was whether or not we also radiate the lymph nodes (in addition to the breast).   We had planned to do this when chemo wasn't happening to be as aggressive as possible, but since I ended up having chemo, I was hoping to avoid.   Radiating the nodes puts me at higher risk for an incredibly uncomfortable condition called lymphedema.   We discussed and Dr. Lingos believes we definitely should radiate them since my case has not followed the norm and we should continue to be aggressive.  So, we are radiating the nodes...

Other than lymphedema, my big fear with radiation is that the right implant gets messed up and I need surgery (or surgeries) in the future to fix it.   Radiation will tighten the skin in that area, which can cause the implant to become mishapen/harden.   As of now, I have one of the best reconstructions most of my doctors have ever seen (they have ALL commented on it... Thank you Dr. Glatt).   There is not much I can really do to prevent an issue, so I am trying not to worry about it.    Dr. Lingos did recommend massaging the implant and moving it around, so I'll try and remember do that daily.   Whatever happens, happens at this point.

Yesterday, I went to the Cancer Center for my "dry run."  Basically, they showed me around and got me into the radiation machine and positioned me to take some pictures.   Luckily, the treatment only takes about 10 minutes because it is not the most comfortable position to be in - lying on my back with my hands above my head.  I feel like my right hand immediately falls asleep when I get it into position!  The first treatment was today and was easy.  Not sure how long before my skins starts to react (it will get red/sunburned and blister).  The other side effect will be fatigue, but I am already tired from the chemo.   One down, 27 to 32 to go.  (Dr. Lingos hasn't decided if I'll have 28 or 33 treatments in total.)

As for other chemo side effects, I still have the neuropathy in my fingers and toes.  It is annoying but not too terribly uncomfortable.  Just imagine feeling like your extremities are falling asleep all the time.  I am hoping the sensation will dull with time and does not become permanent!

Hair

My hair should be starting to grow back, now that chemo is over.  The whole hair loss process has been interesting so a few observations...

• Despite losing hair on most parts of my body, I still have a significant amount of arm hair.   What's so special about arm hair???
• I have maintained a small amount of stubble on my head throughout the process.  Everyone says is looks really light.  If it comes back light, it better be blonde light and not GREY/WHITE light.   Craig has had an ever increasing amount of white hair since I met him and I have always made fun of him.  He'd have way too much fun if my hair comes back grey!
• My eyebrows have definitely thinned.  For once in my life having bushy eyebrows is working in my favor.
• I really wish my leg, armpit and old lady facial hair don't grow back.  (With the radiation, it is likely the armpit hair won't come back on my right side.)  
•  My upper lashes are mostly gone and the lower are thin.  I miss my eyelashes.   Hopefully they'll grow back quickly.
• I lost all my nose hair (early on) which means my nose has been running for 3.5 months.

Overall, the hair loss process has not been as awful as I thought it would be.  It has been a cold winter to be bald but luckily I have lots of warm winter hats!   I am hoping by Hawaii that I have enough hair on my head that it looks like short haircut rather than post-chemo hair.

Port is out!

My port was successfully removed today and I could not be happier.  It went smoothly although I ended up at the hospital for longer than I had anticipated.

I arrived at 10:15 which was the time the told me to be there.  I had never asked what time the actual procedure was and did so after they checked me in and took my vitals at about 10:20.  The procedure was not until 12:00pm AND the surgeon had added another patient in the morning so it was likely to start late.  I was not happy and had not really prepared to wait that long.  I was sent back to the waiting room to hang out for what turned out to be the next 90 minutes.  The time actually passed quickly.  They took be back into pre-op at noon.

Since I had opted for local anesthesia, I did not need an IV. Basically, I just had to change into a gown in pre-op.  They took me into the operating room at about 12:45pm.  When I met with the surgeons PA last week,  he made a comment that the only bad thing about local anesthesia was that I would have to listen to his and the surgeon's jokes.  I thought he was kidding but it turns out he wasn't.  The surgeon literally has a nurse read from a joke book during the procedure. (I assume only when the patient is awake...).  A nurse named Linda was assigned that task. She read a few terrible jokes while I was getting numbed up.  (The lidocaine shots were not particularly pleasant.). The surgeon then left the room while I was getting numb and Linda and I started to chat.  She was lovely, asking me about the kids.  Turns out she lives in the next town over from us.  When the surgeon came back, I told him I preferred to chat with Linda rather than hear bad jokes. Also, I figured I should not be laughing and moving while he had a scalpel near my carotid artery!!

They got me all draped and started removing the port.  I felt some pressure but no pain.  I was afraid I would feel them pulling out the tube that went into my vein but I felt nothing.  (I did smell something nasty.  Not sure what it was and I didn't ask.). I think it took about 10 minutes and it was done.  I am SO happy I did not have anesthesia for the procedure as it really was no big deal and I now don't have to deal with waiting for the anesthesia to totally wear off.   It seems to take longer and longer each time.

They wheeled me back to recovery around 1:15pm.  I had a quick drink, got dressed and was on my way.  There weren't any post-surgical instructions (other than the surgeon telling me to take Tylenol for any pain) and I walked myself out and drove home (stopping off at Target to pick up some random stuff and a coffee).  I took Emily to dance class.  I am a little sore and tired so I will head to bed early. I am glad this is done.

Tomorrow marks the 4th anniversary of my bilateral mastectomy.  That was definitely the most invasive of all the surgeries I have had in the last 4 years.  Today was the 7th surgery and the easiest one.  I feel a sense of closure in my cancer surgery process. I like that. It helps convince me that this is my ONE and ONLY recurrence!!!

Port eviction date TOMORROW

Tomorrow, that ugly bump in my chest will be removed, hopefully giving me plenty of time for the scar to fade before bathing suit season and our HAWAII trip (which starts in 3 months and 18 days).   At the end of the day, I am very thankful to have had the port as it did make chemo much easier and my veins are still in great shape.  Julie, Craig and others... you were right!   It is important for my veins to still be good since after radiation I will only be able to have blood drawn from my left arm.  More on that in a later post...   Other than a few weeks in January, when the port really bothered me (it kind of burned), I have hardly noticed its presence.  Well, except for when I get dressed every day.  Only certain tops cover it up so I have to be careful about what I wear because no one wants to see my ugly port!

The procedure to remove it is quite simple.  It will only take about 10 minutes and will be done under local anesthesia. I am a bit freaked out about being awake for the removal but I am finding the anesthesia hangover lasts longer and longer each time I have it, so happy to avoid it.    I can eat in the morning and drive myself to and from the procedure.  Say a little prayer it goes smoothly!

I am very happy that my oncologist feels confident that I won't need the port anymore and can have it removed before radiation starts!

Chemo #8 - Done, Done, Done Done!!!!!!!!

On November 18 when I started chemo, the end of February seemed VERY far away.   They say "the days are long but the years are short" and that has been so true with this experience.  Some days were incredible wrong and hard, but now that I made it, I realize that 3 months is a relatively short period of time in the grand scheme of things.

I got a picture with my awesome chemo nurse, Mary-Beth:

(There is a bow and a sticker "It's party time!) on the chemo bag.)

Dr. Sinclair and I talked about next steps.  I'll go in for a follow up appointment with her in 2 weeks so she can check my counts (mostly iron) before deciding when to start the ovarian suppression.  The suppression will obviously totally mess with my hormones and make me tired, so she doesn't want to bombard me during radiation (which also makes people tired), especially if my iron is so low.  (Bought some spinach on the way home from chemo to help with my counts!). Once my ovaries are suppressed, I'll star taking Femara.  This is not the drug that was in the study I had found a few weeks ago.  That other drug and Femara have almost the same success rates but Femara seems easier to tolerate. I'll be on it for at least 5 years and maybe 10.  At some point I'll consider removing my one remaining ovary to avoid the every 3 months shots.  I can't handle the idea of surgery right now so that is a later thing. 

Chemo itself was the usual.  At the end, Mary-Beth presented me with the following certificate. I gave her a huge hug and started bawling.  Mary-Beth definitely made a horrible situation a little bit better. I'll still see her at the support group and for my ovarian suppression shots.

I'll feel officially done with chemo by the beginning of next week when I am through the worst of the side effects.  I meet with the radiation oncologist on Friday and get the port out next Tuesday. Woohoo!

Chemo #7 Done

I finished second to last chemo treatment on Wednesday.   My Mom flew up the Friday before and will be with us for three weeks, which is a HUGE help.  Craig was traveling for part of this week and will be working a lot for the rest of the month so it is nice to have the company. 

The treatment itself went fine.  We met with Dr. Sinclair first and I talked about some of the side effects I have been having - blurry vision, sore jaw, joint and bone pain, and neuropathy (tingling and numbness in my fingers and feet).  All are normal for Taxol.   We also talked about post-chemo treatment - radiation (which will start March 11) and hormone therapy/ovarian suppression.   It is still TBD when I will start that.  She wants to give me some time to recover from chemo as shutting down my ovaries will yield its own unpleasant side effects.  We might even wait until after our June trip to Hawaii to get that process started. 

Three days out, I feel ok.  I had the usual neulasta back and neck bone pain yesterday, which was no fun.  Today, I'll feel more joint pain in my legs.    Craig and I are hopefully headed out to dinner tonight with friends, as long as the latest snow storm does not mess up our plans.  Thanks to Mom for babysitting!

Two weeks from now I will be done with chemo treatments!!!!

Happy day!

Thank you to the New England Patriots for winning the Super Bowl in rather dramatic fashion last night. It mad Craig and Raymond VERY happy and the universe owed them some joy amidst all the crap we have been going through as a family these last few months. We watched most of the game at a friend's house but Raymond was a bit tired, having gone to the Bruins game on Saturday night, so he and I came home before the game was over and watched the rest of it together.  It was a fun moment to share with him and I took this picture right after the thrilling end of the game.   Wow, my head is shiny!   ;)

I'm still pretty achy from last week's Taxol treatment but this feeling is better than the complete exhaustion and nausea from the AC treatments.  Only 2 more to go!   I finish THIS MONTH.   February seemed so far way when I started in November. 

Once chemo is done, it appears things will move pretty quickly.   I'll get the port out ASAP and I think I am starting radiation on March 11.   That means I will be done with this phase of treatment by the end of April.  Maybe we could have gone to Disney World as planned in May but Hawaii will be a much more special trip for us.  Of course I am starting to be a little scared for post-treatment life and how I keep the cancer fear at bay but it will be nice to not have life revolve around how I am feeling in a chemo cycle.